It is difficult to admit that it still makes me cry in the middle of the night every time I remember how my dreams shattered in front of me and all I can do was to watch. It hurts.
I couldn't even pick up the pieces. I thought before, I was just crippled. I was given clutches and was very happy but those clutches didn't last long and as they broke I also lost my arms. And it felt the worst. I don't know what to do anymore. I don't know what to do with my life all over again, every time in the middle of the night.
All I can do is to sleep it off and wipe my tears and face reality. Reality that no matter how hard you try to plan things in your life it's just not gonna happen all according to your will. Life will always has its way of turning it upside down and lead you to something else but not always for the better.
I'll sleep, holding on to that thought, wish, that hopefully tomorrow, in the morning when I wake up everything will be okay again and it will all just be a dream, a nightmare.
This thoughts keep me awake, in the middle of the night.
xoxo
